this is what i think:
i dont think people are ever "bad". they dont do bad things cus they want to, but its cus they need to. sometimes the bad way to go is the easier way to go and thats why people tend to do it.
but my point is i think it's unfair that ppl are labeled as "bad" jus cus of something wrong they did in the past. everyone has their "bad" moments or history. i believe that people can change. they might have been like this or that BEFORE. but NOW can be different.
so this is why when someone tells me something about someone, i try to not believe it. because often times, even best friends tend to miss things about one another. and they might think they know someone but no one really KNOWS someone unless that someone tells you that themselves. they might see the outside, but the inside cant be seen, it must be heard. so when ppl talk about other ppl, things get misheard and rumors starts and might make that person sound like something he/she isnt. honestly tho sometimes when someone tells me something bad , it does sometimes mess with my head. but at the end of the day, i tell myself i need to witness it for myself and it helps.
i think the best way to know someone is to just them directly. even if its a personal question, it can be asked. but do it politely and if they dont want to tell u, then respect that b/c not everyone needs to know everything. curiosity is a desire, not a necessity. so i personally like it when ppl just ask me things, rather then hear it from others. im pretty open but if i dont tell, then i dont tell. i know its hard sometimes cus u dont know how comfortable or open someone is and thats just reality. but i give permission to anybody to ask me anything about me cus i rather u ask and me not tell u then to have you trying to go figure it out from other ppl that can get me wrong.