"Love in its truest sense is not based on feelings."

Confidence and Laziness

man. i think im at the point where im getting confidence and laziness mixed up. its like i dont do things cus i am "confident" that i am capable of doing fine at the state of where i am now. but thats not the right attitude. like for calc, ive taken BC already so basically everything im learning i already learned. b/c i tell myself this, i tend to not study as hard and i forget the little things and i end up doing bad on the tests. but now i realize that this mentality is really going to hurt me and i HAVE TO change my attitude before its too late.

i have to remember that God blessed me by putting me into college and allowing me to study. its $30000 a year and He has made it possible for me to put up with it. i must glorify Him and take advantage of Davis and not just throw it down the drain. i just pray that i over come the state that i am at now and not fail my first quarter. please pray for me. also pray that after i overcome this, i will remain disciplined to continue to glorify Him through hard work and not just work hard through the toughest of times.

thanks joy for reminding me of this and putting it in perspective. seeing her so disciplined kind of pushes me to be the same.

No Appreciation

i feel kinda bad right now. so my dad called me today and told me he bought some sort of bike light thing for me. but being me, i told him i already had a one and i did. but i should of showed more appreciation for it. this is like one of the attempts that he does to try and do something good for me. and all the other times like the stuff he bought me was totally not what i liked or needed. but this time it was the closest he ever got. but i kinda rejected it. it did sound like he put quite some effort into it. he ended up saying "too late i bought it" so yea. i guess he doesnt take it too offensively and know that i do appreciate the effort even though im not so good at showing it. sigh*

Fable

just a cool fable i liked from Our Daily Bread.

-[There was] a man who was browsing in a store when he made the shocking discovery that God was behind a sales counter. So the man walked over and asked, “What are You selling?” God replied, “What does your heart desire?” The man said, “I want happiness, peace of mind, and freedom from fear . . . for me and the whole world.” God smiled and said, “I don’t sell fruit here. Only seeds.”

Jim sent me a message today. it was great and im very blessed to hear his supporting words. but the thing that stood out most was " develop your personal(your own) relationship with God". that made me think about myself. ive been relying too much on church, fellowship and small groups only, to help me grow. ive been using others to grow myself. when i need to set my own personal relationship straight with Him. im missing the emotion and need to spend more time with Him alone. pray for me. praise God for putting people like Jim in my life.